So, I had no idea what this book was about at all when I started it. I hadn't even read a back cover blurb about it. For some reason I had a vague idea that it had something to do with witchcraft. Don't ask because I have no idea why. I did however know a little about Sylvia Plath, but I wasn't aware that the book was somewhat autobiographical. I figured it out as I went along though.
In the beginning I was annoyed with Esther. She had this huge opportunity and she was so ungrateful and, well pretty much just emo about the whole thing.There was a turning point for me right before she left to go back home from New York. On the day of the last photos she says:
"I didn't want my picture taken because I was going to cry. I didn't know why I was going to cry, but I knew that if anybody spoke to me or looked at me too closely the tears would fly out of my eyes and the sobs would fly out of my throat and I'd cry for a week. I could feel the tears brimming and sloshing in me like water in a glass that is unsteady and too full."
I've felt that before. Exactly that! She made me feel that feeling and then I felt for her. Empathy kicked in and I went from hating her to knowing her. Sylvia Plath knows how to explain depression like no one else. She lived it and died from it, and her poetic talent can pull you into the darkness without you realizing it. The story bounces around a lot with flashbacks and at least one glimpse into the future beyond the end of the novel.
I caught the comment in the very beginning about her letting her baby chew on a piece of the sun glass case, and I reminded myself about that one comment every time I thought it was the end.
The time between New York and the Asylum was hard to read. Plath was so effective at writing from Esther's point of view. Esther's mother was just clueless, but I felt sorry for her. She didn't understand what was going on with Ester, and she was trying to help her, but she just never got it right. This is hard to explain, but I felt so bad for Esther each time something went wrong in her plans to end her life. It's not that I wanted her to kill herself, but I just felt like the fact that she kept failing was going to destroy her even more. She wanted it to be perfect, but something always went wrong.
Once she got to the asylum I had high hopes. Armed with the foreshadowing that she would eventually have a child, I tried to convince myself that she would get better. Doctor Nolan seemed to understand her better than anyone had yet. But the fact that they were doing insulin shock therapy plus electroshock therapy kind of dampened my high hopes for her recovery.
I love where Plath ended the story. It was a hopeful ending, which was just what the reader, and I think what the Author, needed.
The version I read had a mini bio of Plath and a comparison of the lives of Ester and Plath. I did not know that Plath committed suicide while her children were sleeping. She blocked off the kitchen with wet towels to keep the carbon monoxide from leaking out to where the children were, and it was approximately 4 hours between her death and when her day nurse showed up and found her body. It's hard to imagine the desperation that lead to such an act, but Plath gives you the seeds of her story in the novel. I would be very interested in reading a biography on Sylvia Plath, and I plan on reading more of her poetry.
Sorry this took so long, but I have been thinking about this book daily, and I'm not sure if it was because of her writing, or because of the time of month I read this novel, but I have been blue beyond my normal range since I finished this book. All in all, I'm glad I read this book. It's one that will stick with me.
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